Mr Potato

Hey Mr Potato
Do you remember me?
It's me, can't you see?
Your biggest fan,
me, your soul mate
Gee, until I breathe.

My very first time,
I met the slender you,
The tender you,
Shiny and crispy
I only had a few
Minutes, you knew.

Days passed, and that was years ago
I couldn't let you go
Of you I dreamt,
My days I spent,
Every party I went
Although you cost me
Only 50 cents.

No, it was not the money
Your so dark and funny
Salt and pepper
Chilli and honey
Plain and peri peri
So plenty, why the hurry?

I was blinded by
My love for you,
My faith in you, you
Were my devotion, you
my constitution, you
My new year's resolution.

Like every great love story
This has to end
I had to mend
My broken heart
I had to tend.
Make pretend.

You had asked me to stay away
From the broken scale
What did you call him? A sorry tale,
From, the discount sale
You were so conniving,
I could tell.

I had to get over you
I had no clue
You wound your web
Everywhere,
At the corner store
That 'M' you bore.

You know what?
I'm meeting your fat twin
He's not as handsome
But it's a win-win
He's bigger and softer,
But honest within.

Do you know he's baked?
No, he's not fake.
I would not take
him, just to make
Your thin ass shake
Hard and break.

No, I deserve better
You shit old snack
I would never crack
You can never hack
Forget me now
I'm never coming back.